Adventures with Japanese Horror: Ginuea Pig movies

 

Hello again, guys and ghouls. 

I hope you're all faring well during our current year of hell. We're officially past the halfway point, so now as we're slipping into a new season and potentially into oblivion, we can slow down officially now that the spring and summer season are fading into fall and winter. 

And since we're heading into fall you know what that means- Halloween. And of course Halloween means a lot of us are going to be watching more scary, spooky, creepy and ooky flicks. It comes with the territory- what better way to experience fear and horror from the safety of our homes than on our TV screens? Okay, and obviously I'm not referring to the real horror and fear on the news every day; this is a chance for us to distance ourselves from the actual real atrocities we are living through and venture into and come out of some temporarily threatening situations in a fictional reality and be totally A-OK because ultimately it's just a scary movie. 

I know it's still really early for Halloween, and I know I have been focusing on some spooky and disturbing movies for the past few months anyway. If I'm being completely honest I haven't really stopped trying to push myself into watching more and more disturbing films- I guess it's my new way of coping with the crippling existential dread that 2020 has given a lot of us. But I was thinking, why not start listing some stuff early? Why not share some interesting or gross titles with you guys before the big day so you have plenty of time to decide which movies to add to your Halloween-movie-marathon list? Anyway, that's the goal I'm going for here. 

So first we're going to focus on some great horror from Japan. I don't know if any of you have ever seen any Japanese horror or thriller movies, but honestly, they're probably some of my favorite horror flicks- they are more cerebral and foreboding than American horror, I would say. While American horror focuses on a lot of startling tactics, utilizing score and jump scares, Japanese horror tends to be more quiet, more reserved, and it always builds up to it's peak of fear instead of smacking the audience in the face with effects or surprises. 

Some of the most notable Japanese horror movies would definitely be Ju-On and Ringu; both titles have a fair amount of sequels and both of which have been adopted and remade in America as The Grudge and The Ring or Rings. The Death Note movies were also choice- the ones that actually came from Japan and not the one Netflix spat out to us a few years ago (for those of you who haven't seen it, don't. It's a waste of time). These flicks are really great, and I'm honestly a huge fan of  each of them and highly recommend checking them out, but there are so many more extremely creepy and disturbing films from the Land of the Rising Sun that more people should know about. Today, we're going to be talking about some pretty extreme titles- specifically, The Guinea Pig movies. 

**Warning! Warning! You are now entering the part of the blog that discusses potentially triggering topics such as mutilation, bodily fluids, torture, abduction, mental illness, etc. If any of these topics will cause you to stress out, have a panic attack or whatever, maybe consider not reading further. If you keep reading, hey- you've been warned. Don't at me. 

The Guinea Pig movies (ギニーピッグ, Ginī Piggu) are a series of films that came out in Japan in the 80's and early 90's. They all feature different stories, all of which are dark, twisted, and disturbing. If you're thinking that these movies involve adorable, cuddly rodents you are clearly reading the wrong blog and need to turn back now. The movies in this series call themselves "Guinea Pig" as their subject matter, production, and special effects are all of a purely experimental fashion. These movies are pretty intense in terms of gore- if you have a hard time stomaching a lot of violence and blood effects, these are some films you probably would have a hard time with. 

The Guinea Pig movie series has 6 movies in total- one title in particular has earned itself a cult following, which we will talk about later, but others don't seem to be as well-known, at least from what I've seen in my research and viewing. 

Years later, the Guinea Pig series would be picked up and essentially added-onto by the film production company Unearthed Films, where they released American Guinea Pig. I haven't watched any of these, and currently I'm not in a huge rush to watch them. Call me an elitist or a hipster, but I'm more interested in the original batch. 

For this blog, I've watched 5 of the films, one of which I couldn't find a good version of, so hopefully one day I'll finish the whole catalog, but as of right now we'll go with the 5 I did see. So strap yourselves in, kids. We're going to deep-dive into some of the most intense horror from the Land of the Rising Sun... 

The Devil's Experiment

The Devil's Experiment is the first in the series and honestly, I found it to be the most simultaneously boring, and jacked up of the films in the series, if that makes any sense. Essentially the film just focuses on some group of guys who have abducted a woman and they torture her a whole lot for, from what I could tell, unknown reasons. They spend the first like, 4 minutes of the movie slapping her. Most of the slaps looked thankfully like prat-slaps, so they didn't appear to actually connect with her face from the angle it was shot in. But later the camera changes angles and I'm pretty sure a few of the slaps actually connected with her cheek, and that bugged me a lot. Later they put her in a swivel chair and just spin her around and around until she vomits and passes out, which in watching it I was thinking sarcastically, "...Wow... that's some hardcore torture, fellas..." but the more I put myself in her shoes the less sarcastic I got about it. Then there's a period where they put some headphones on her head and play loud, ear-drum wrecking noises, and again, that was simultaneously disturbing and also boring because eventually, my mind tapped out and got more wrapped up in a game on my cellphone than watching something awful like that. Eventually it ramps up to them straight up inserting needles in her eyes, and that's where the movie got me freaking out. And eventually, from what I could tell, they just leave her for dead in the forest. That's it- that's the movie. 

This one was definitely the weakest film in terms of production quality, though how they pulled off those eye-effects is still a dang mystery to me- but this one like I said, was simultaneously dull and disturbing in my opinion (*note* I almost put "in my eyes", but I figured it was too soon...). If you want to challenge yourself, this is flick will definitely be just that, but honestly I didn't think this was all that great for many reasons, so don't beat yourself up if you decide to skip it. 

Flower of Flesh and Blood

Well well well- here we go with probably the most notorious of the films in the Guinea Pig series, Flower of Flesh and Blood.  This film is probably the most prolific in the series and as mentioned at the beginning of this blog, it has garnered a bit of a cult following among horror fans. Here's a fun bit of trivia for you- allegedly, once Charlie Sheen happened upon this movie, watched it, and was absolutely convinced this was a real-life snuff film, so he contacted the FBI to look into it. Oh boy, friends, we're in for a treat. 

Flowers of Flesh and Blood (ギニーピッグ2 血肉の華, Ginī Piggu 2: Chiniku no Hana) was directed by the legendary horror mangaka (manga artist) Hideshi Hino and focuses on a woman who one night gets abducted off of the street by some wacko who is dressed like a samurai. Samurai-guy then takes her to what I'm assuming is is home and proceeds to drug her, dismember her, ultimately murder her- all the while marveling over how beautiful the human body is when it's bleeding and getting chopped up. Then, for the finale we get a little tour and are shown what he does with the fun trophies he gets from his victims. Seriously, if you were expecting more of a story here, you'll be sadly let down- not many of these films are heavy in the story department, as they're usually only 40 minutes long.  But what this film lacks in overt storyline, it really made up for with its notoriety. The film was pretty much black listed because of its extreme depiction of gore, and is also allegedly influenced serial killer Tsutomu Miyazaki, who is known as the Otaku Killer. Isn't that fun, you guys? 

In terms of effects, some of them are disturbingly good- and a couple of them are seen in other movies in this series. Luckily though, they're not too good, because there are a few times were you can just tell the things on screen are fake, so hopefully none of you brave souls who end up watching this movie will think it's real. Just remember kids- it's all just a movie, it's all just a movie... 

Flower of Flesh and Blood is one that I find pretty scary, just because on of my biggest fears is getting abducted off the street and tortured, so in terms of a horror movie it does deliver a fright factor. This is also a fun film to challenge yourself with, or even see how far you and a group of friends can get into it. It's pretty intense, like we've discussed, but in terms of Japanese horror and gore, this is definitely a heavy hitter that has to be experienced at some point. 

He Never Dies

He Never Dies, or Shudder! The Man Who Never Dies (ギニーピッグ3 戦慄! 死なない男, Ginī Piggu 3: Senritsu! Shinanai Otoko) is probably my favorite film in this series. It honestly has a more dark-comedic tone than the other movies on the list, and while it does have some pretty gross imagery it's not that great, and there are a couple times in the movie you see some effect snafus. Basically, this film follows a Japanese guy who is fairly miserable- he has a rough time at work, possibly has insomnia and doesn't seem to have a whole lot of friends or anything. So one day, he's had enough and decides to commit suicide. After he has cut his wrists, he notices that no matter how much he bleeds out, he's not dying. So he tries to speed up the process, and does more extreme stuff to himself that should do that job, but he just won't die. Eventually, he chops himself up to the point he's just a goofy talking head on a coffee table- the end! 

Once you learn that the guy can't kill himself, the movie becomes increasingly predictable, but honestly in conjunction with the other movies in the series, this is a welcomed thing. He Never Dies doesn't take itself too seriously, and is well aware of it's gross-goofy plot and utilizes it well. It almost reminded me of a slightly more bloody version of Death Becomes Her, but much shorter and without any major conflict aside from his undiscovered indestructibility. This one is gross, and potentially triggering, so if you think you would be bothered with scenes of attempted suicide, steer clear of this one. But if you can handle it definitely check this one out- it was kind of fun. 

Android of Notre Dame

The copy of Android of Notre Dame (ギニーピッグ ノートルダムのアンドロイド, Ginī Piggu: Nōtorudamu no Andoroido) I found honestly didn't have the best subtitles, so I found myself lost to what was happening in the story because my Japanese isn't that strong. But it did seem like one I would probably like if I knew what the hell was being said. 

Essentially, from what I could tell, there's this scientist guy who is a little person, and he has a sister that seems like she's got consumption, and he is conducting experiments to try and revive corpses so he can be ready to bring his sister back if she dies- this part of the story seemed more like Frankenstein to me than anything in relation to The Hunchback of Notre Dame. The scientist guy does mention it, but the subtitles didn't actually show what he was saying in regards to it so I have no idea how it fits in with the overall story. Anyway, there's this other guy who is like, blackmailing the scientist guy or something, and he shows up to the scientist guys's house, gets his legs chopped off in a booby trap, and eventually kind of ends up like the guy from He Never Dies where he's essentially a talking head on a table. But then these experiments are done on him for... reasons... And eventually the scientist dude's sister dies, and he revives her, but then she gets mad at him for taking away from being at peace, and then she just dies again, and... that's about it. I think. Again, I'm not super sure. 

This one had a more classical horror feel to it- thanks to the whole mad scientist character and calling back to Frankenstein, as mentioned. I want to see if I can find another copy of this with better subtitles- this one did have some gore, especially in the scenes where he's attempting to revive corpses, but otherwise it seemed more story-driven than a lot of the other movies in the series. 

Mermaid in a Manhole

This is, oddly enough, probably one of my other favorite entries in this series. Mermaid in a Manhole (ギニーピッグ マンホールの中の人魚, Ginī Piggu: Manhōru no Naka no Ningyo) is the only other film in this series that was directed by Hideshi Hino himself. Also, I'm sure you noticed that this graphic and the graphic for Android of Notre Dame both are listed as being "Film #4"- fun fact, there has been some debate as to where this movie falls in the series, whether it's film 4 or 5. For the sake of the blog, I'm making the graphic say it's #4, and counting it via entry as #5. But I digress- moving on. 

This film tells the story of a painter who likes to spend time in the sewers near his house. One day he finds an actual mermaid in the sewer, and decides to sketch her. Soon however, the mermaid starts developing pustules on her body that cause her a lot of pain, so the painter decides to take her to his home and put her in a bathtub so he can finish painting her. The sores continue to spread, however, and soon start rupturing with multi-colored pus, which the artist uses to finish his painting. 

I'm personally a fan of Dr. Pimple Popper, so seeing cysts and whatnot expressed is one of my favorite things ever (yes, I'm one of those people), so I can't say I was personally bothered by the pus too much, but I know for some people that could be a little gross. There's also a pretty decent twist ending in this one, which kind of leaves you guessing- if you're a fan of that kind of thing this is definitely one to check out.  Also, while you do spend most of the film following around the artist and the mermaid, the story also gets punctuated by interactions with the artist's neighbors. They add a little bit of levity and clarity to an otherwise insane story, so I really appreciated the scenes with them. This one is pretty gross for sure, but I, personally, will probably re-watch it this Halloween. 

While watching these movies, I found a fun little making-of documentary that really took away some of the abject horror of some of the grosser scenes, but also really made me appreciate the actual work and artistry that went into making the movies. Maybe if you're curious but a bit on the squeamish side this could be worth checking out instead of the actual movies, but I feel like without seeing the movies first you wouldn't really get a lot of what's going on or being explained and displayed. 

Well guys and ghouls, that does it for the first part of the Adventures with Japanese Horror series. Next I'll be diving into and talking about some of my personal favorite Japanese horror films. These are scary, a little bit gross, but a lot less disgusting as the Guinea Pig series. I hope you found something enjoyable in this blog that is chronicling my slow descent into cinematic madness, and hopefully I've shared some titles with you that you would have never heard about otherwise. 

Take care everyone and I'll see you all again soon! 

Some Random Movies You Should Watch

Well, well, well. I'm once again changing my blogging/movie reviewing plans. I originally wanted to review Christian movies, but I don't think I'm at that level yet. I enjoy being shocking and sharing said shocking info, but I dunno. I feel like tackling movies in that particular genre that deals with something as personal as faith may be too controversial and offensive to some- I dunno. It's still an idea that I might do in the future, but for right now I'm going to talk about some movies that I actually enjoy, and think that you should all watch.

For this list I'm just going to talk about some films that have entertained me in some fashion. Some are weird, some are concerning, some are kind of dumb but all of them are pretty good (in my book at least) and are something you may want to consider checking out.

Tusk

 This is a very strange film that was given to us by director Kevin Smith, who has also blessed us with cinematic gems like "Clerks", "Mallrats", "Chasing Amy" and more. This movie, however, is pretty different from his other films. It's a comedy-horror film that was pretty much based on a weird flyer that was discussed on his podcast, and let me tell you- it's a freaking hoot. The main character of this flick is a podcaster named Wallace who is kind of an Internet shitlord; he tends to make fun of people over his podcast and doesn't  really seem to care about the consequences his jokes have. After an interview for his podcast fails, he travels to Canada and meets an old man with a wildly interesting story that he wants to discuss over the air, but the old man isn't all that he seems and soon Wallace finds himself in a very twisted and dire situation.

I don't want to give up too much about this movie, because it is so weird and so wild that it has to be seen to be believed. Now, keep in mind this IS a horror film, so there is gore associated and some shocking imagery but honestly, maybe I'm sick in the brain for saying this but I love this movie and I think it's grossly hilarious. When I watch "Tusk" I'm not sure if I'm more disgusted, confused, or in utter disbelief at the things being burned into my retinas while watching this, but it does make me laugh and laugh hard. "Tusk" was originally supposed to be the 1st in a trilogy of crazy films that take place in Canada, but I don't think the full trilogy was ever finished. The second movie in the trilogy was a little flick called "Yoga Hosers" and while it was weird, I do feel that "Tusk" was the better of the two, and honestly could be a standalone film. If you want to see something crazy that will make you wonder how in the actual hell something like that was ever made, I highly recommend "Tusk". And extra bonus- it's currently on Netflix. So all of you who are staying at home to avoid the evil 'Rona- stop watching "Tiger King" for the 5th time and check out this train wreck.

The Witch

I can't remember if I've discussed this movie in previous blogs, but this one bears being brought up again. "The Witch" is probably one of the best horror/thriller movies I've seen in a long time. The story is about a Puritan family that is excommunicated from their village because of their extreme beliefs and opinions (extreme to a Puritan? Is that even possible?), and they go to make a home for themselves in the woods. Little do they know something dark lurks in the forest, and soon the evil that is all around them permeates the family's sanity and trust of one another, leading them to spiral into paranoia and fervent panic.

This film is brilliant- I can't recommend this one enough. The movie is also billed as "The Witch: A New England Folktale" and that's exactly how it plays out. It's legitimately like that of a film version of some random folktale from the 1700's;  like something you'd read from Washington Irving. All of the dialog is in Old English, so it adds to the tone of the story and really draws you into the world that the story establishes. It's interesting to see how paranoia and fervent religious reactions can affect a family when tragedy strikes. This movie is a thinker, for sure. The ending leaves a lot of space for the viewer to draw their own conclusions to what the film is about, and what the director was trying to say and I personally love a movie that will make me think. I can't recommend this one enough- if you don't mind scary stories that are heavy on disturbing imagery and mind games verses all out gore and mindless torture, this is a movie for you.

Eagle vs. Shark

Moving on to something a little lighter! Anyone who knows me knows that I love quirky humor- movies like "Napoleon Dynamite" or "The Greasy Strangler" are my jam. And as someone who loves quirky humor, I am a fan of the work of director Taika Waititi. This dude is freaking amazing. I honestly could recommend all of this work- "Flight of the Conchords", "What We Do In The Shadows" and even "Thor: Ragnarok". I'm not a huge fan of the Marvel movies but I will say that "Thor: Ragnarok" is pretty solid and I love it. But one of my favorite things Mr. Waititi has done is "Eagle vs. Shark".

The movie focuses on Lily, a socially awkward outcast who is pining over nerdy-tech-store-clerk Jarrod. She gets a sort-of invitation to an Animal Party Jarrod is hosting, and while there the two start a very strange relationship. Lily soon learns that Jarrod is not the nicest guy in the world, and through a few ups and downs Lily forges a stronger sense of self-acceptance, and her growth starts a chain reaction of positive changes and a new sense of clarity for and in the people around her, which leads to healing all around. Jarrod also learns this lesson, all while seeking the ultimate revenge against his ultimate foe.

This movie is wacky, but it's really heartfelt and is actually kind of heartwarming. I'm usually not into Rom Coms but I make an exception for this one. 

Blue Valentine

Oh, "Blue Valentine"... Okay, so this one I will say is a harsh movie. Not in terms of disturbing or shocking imagery or plot or anything like that, but this film is deeply depressing. Now, just because it's depressing doesn't mean it's not good. The film is actually pretty brilliant- it's well acted, well directed, and well written. Typically I don't just consider films to be solely for entertainment- they're also pieces of art that are created to say or convey something, and are generally supposed to evoke some sort of emotion from the viewer. This film hits all of those requirements. It's amazing, but damn- it will absolutely rip your heart out.

The film follows a couple through their relationship. You see how these two young lovers came
together and fall in love, but the whole middle part of their relationship is never shown. The film also shoots forward into the present to show that the two lovers did end up getting married, but their relationship is deteriorating fast. It's incredibly jarring, and I think that's the point. Anyone who has ever been in loves knows the all consuming giddiness of falling in love, and the power of mutual attraction is so strong and so raw, and in contrast the same can be said about falling out of love in terms of the strength of the feelings associated with it. The pain, the anger, the disgust- all of those really nasty feelings are equally strong. In viewing this movie, both sets of conflicting emotions are fully portrayed to the viewer, and I would be absolutely shocked if someone can watch this and NOT feel something. If you can prepare your mind and emotions for this roller coaster, I highly recommend it, even if it's a film you can only watch once.

The Room 

Oh man, what can be said about "The Room"? This movie is considered one of the worst films ever made; the "Citizen Kane" of bad movies, if you will. The movie has become a cult icon over the years and for good reason. It's so odd it's worth watching to see what happens next. So many things happen and don't happen at the same time- it's a visual juxtaposition and I love it so much. Apparently a lot of people do, also- even big name stars like Alec Baldwin, Kristen Bell, and more. James Franco even actually made a movie based off the book "The Disaster Artist" that is literally about the making of "The Room".  Seriously, "The Disaster Artist" is a great film on it's own, but it's
definitely a love letter to fans of "The Room". If you don't look up any other movie I'm discussing in this post you NEED to find this one and watch it. And if life ever goes back to normal after this outbreak "The Room" is definitely a candidate for having a movie night with friends. It's hilarious.

The whole plot of "The Room" can be summed up in a few sentences, but there is just too much to discuss- like, this movie is loaded with insanely quotable lines that are either nonsensical or are completely over-acted. It's a magical cinematic ride, let me tell you. I won't discuss this film further. I will say, if you want to know more about it, clearly you have Internet access if you're reading this- go to YouTube and look up some reviews of it. They're all hilarious, but they don't even put a candle to the full insanity of "The Room".

Cats

Yes, THAT "Cats". The one that everyone panned and memed to death. Is it a good movie? I wouldn't say it is necessarily, but the film does completely take your mind off of whatever is going on in your life for a little while, so that's something of a plus I would say.

For those who don't know, "Cats" is the cinematic adaptation of the Broadway stage play of the same name. In general, "Cats" doesn't have much in the way of an actual story. Basically it's just about a bunch of different cats who introduce themselves through song, and at the end of the story the leader cat Old Deuteronomy decides which cat gets to go to the "Heaviside Layer" to be reborn in a new life. And that's it- that's pretty much the point of "Cats". Now, I will give the film credit- they did try to explain why the different cats are competing for death, and there is an actual villain with a sort-of
plot- it's all really paper thin and one note, but at least they tried to give this thing a story.

I found "Cats" to be a surreal musical fever dream that made me feel things, both good and bad. I will say though, as much as I enjoyed the absolute CGI insanity, all of the negative critiques about the movie were valid. You never really get used to the CGI cat bodies that seem more naked than the characters actually being naked, the strange imagery and sort-of story- it's nuttier than a fruitcake, y'all. But, having said that, I enjoyed the singing, I enjoyed the actual pathos in some scenes, and I thought it was really a brave move by the filmmakers to even tackle this. Honestly, considering how weird "Cats" the play is, I honestly can't think of a better way to tackle a film adaptation of it than how they did. Having said that, this is a perfect example of why some things shouldn't be adapted and are better left alone, but by George this team owned it. No one phoned it in, everyone was clearly committed, so snaps for them.


Well guys, I guess that's all for now. Thanks for reading this little list, and I hope you really do check out some of these little oddities; they're honestly all really enjoyable for one reason or another. Give 'em a chance- you have nothing better to do in quarantine anyway, am I right?

Brain Breakers #3- HEAVYWEIGHT Category

What. In the world. Was. I. Thinking.

Well everyone, this is the final category in the Brain Breakers series. I'm going to be honest with you guys- I've re-written this post's opening paragraph no less than 5 times. While last post's films were disturbing to some extent, the films I'll be discussing today have gone beyond that. Obviously- that's how they were placed in the category they are in currently. These films have fully succeeded in breaking my brain; I've lost sleep, felt repulsed and like I was going to throw up, cringed, covered my eyes while saying "No, no, no, no, no" and have audibly asked myself "What the *$&@ am I watching...?! WHAT THE *$&@ AM I WATCHING?!" Obviously, this is something I chose to do, and only have myself to blame. However, having said that I did have to remind myself a couple times why I had decided to do this whole film-viewing series. I will say I definitely achieved my intended goal- quarantine has become a lot more bearable, and I can definitely see the positives in my quiet, non-atrocity filled life. These films kind of put things in perspective in a really weird kind of way....

As mentioned on my Brain Breaker announcement post, I got the idea to do this because I had stumbled upon a video on YouTube discussing videos that can distract us from the scary awful world we all live in currently. All of these films I have only ever  heard of from May on the YouTube channel "Nyx Fears", so I want to give her full credit for even getting me started on this weird cinematic trip. Without her video discussing movies you shouldn't watch under any circumstance I wouldn't be here today telling you guys about these flicks. Again, if you've liked any of the films discussed so far, I would suggest subscribing to Nyx Fears as May is amazing and discusses films that are similar to this in really cool, relatable and analytical ways. May- if you ever see this, you rock!

Moving on. Below I will be discussing three hard-to-watch films; Enter the Void, Antichrist,  and Visitor Q.  As stated in the above disclaimer, there will be a lot of spoilers ahead as I honestly don't see a way to discuss some of the things in these movies and properly convey why exactly they were so shocking and brain-breaking. These movies aren't without artistic merit, though; being shocking does not immediately make a movie "bad"- and honestly I can say that these films all challenged me in different ways as a viewer and will inevitably affect how I will view film moving forward. Now that that's out of the way- let's get to the task at hand. Put on your big kid pants, everyone. This is where it gets real.

Enter the Void is a film directed by Gaspar Noe that follows the story of a man named Oscar who is currently living in Tokyo and is dealing and drugs around the city, as well as using them. In the film Oscar, while delivering some of his wares, is ratted out to the police by a friend he'd had a conflict with. Oscar hides in a nearby bathroom in a night club called "The Void" while the police order him to open to door. During the conflict Oscar is subsequently shot and dies. The film at that point follows his spirit as it moves through the present, his past traumas, and eventually moves to reincarnation.  But one very important thing to note about this film- it's all shot in 1st person point-of-view; so you, the viewer, are seeing literally everything from Oscar's point of view. You witness everything- even when Oscar's past is reflected upon you see everything right behind Oscar's head much like that of an out-of-body experience. So that really makes things beyond disturbing in themselves. 

Now, before I get too into the film itself, let's talk about Tibetan Buddhism and psychedelic drugs for a second. These two things have a huge impact on the story; these topics are explained via exposition in the early scenes of the movie, but I thought for the sake of the blog I would touch on them here as well. The movie actually starts off with Oscar smoking and tripping on a psychedelic drug called D.M.T. D.M.T, or N-Dimethyltryptamine is a hallucinogenic tryptamine drug. It is a white crystalline powder, and sometimes a resin. It is typically smoked and creates a strong psychedelic experience that lasts for short periods of time, typically anywhere between 5 to 50 minutes on average. On the street it's also known as Business Man's Trip for its short tripping duration versus other psychedelics that cause significantly longer psychedelic experiences that can last for hours. D.M.T. is naturally produced by various animals and plants, and it's even speculated that the human pineal gland secretes it, and releases it when a human is dying.

What does any of that have to do with Tibetan Buddhism, though? Well, as Oscar is tripping on D.M.T., his friend Alex comes over and accompanies him to The Void. While the pair are walking to the club, Oscar and Alex talk about a book that Alex had recently loaned to Oscar; The Tibetan Buddhist Book of the Dead. Alex explains that the book details what the Tibetan Buddhists believe happens to a person's soul after they die; first a person's spirit can see things going on around itself as it's out of the body. Then, the spirit will start to relive past traumas and it could revisit the same traumas repeatedly if necessary. Then there's a period where the spirit sees everything around it covered in vibrant, bright lights; this is apparently the phase that most spirits don't want to leave because it's so beautiful. Then the spirit will be drawn to people who are in the act of making love. According to the book a bright yellow light is emitted from the couple's groin area- the light of combining sacral chakras is what draws spirits in. At that point the spirit can choose which couple it wants to be reborn to as a baby, and the spirit will inherit a whole new life.

Those two factors literally are the hinges the movie hangs on, and it is explored and experienced entirely. While other things do happen that also further the story of Oscar's loved ones and how they cope with his death, literally everything Alex explains in the beginning of the film comes to fruition as you, the viewer, travel through this weird afterlife experience.  

This film obviously features death and different opinions of what happens after a person dies, and that alone can raise some hairs. Also, the graphic sex scenes are plentiful in this film. You get to even see the act of love making from the inside: try to use your imagination to pick up what I'm describing. Chances are you know exactly what I'm talking about. Also, I can say without a shred of doubt this film features probably one of the most accurate visuals on what it's like to have a psychedelic trip. That said, one thing I wish I had paid attention to before starting the film: it is LONG. I wish I had looked at the duration before I got sucked into the story, I'll tell you that. It clocks in at a little over 3 hours, so be prepared to be on this ride for a while. In addition to the duration, the entrancing use of psychedelic imagery, first person perspective, haunting memories of past experiences and more- this is a film that definitely makes an impression and will draw anyone in. It's not just a film, but an experience, and it's brave enough to explore a question that every person has asked at some point in their life; what happens when you die?  If you feel brave enough to see this director's interpretation of the answer, I say go for it. The film is well made, well shot, well acted and will keep you drawn in- even through all of it's craziness. But if you'd prefer to skip on having a cinematic out-of-body-experience, this movie isn't one you would enjoy. 

Next up is Lars von Trier's Antichrist. This film follows the story of a man and his wife. One day while the couple is making love, their 2 year old son Nic falls from a window in their home and dies. The wife becomes consumed with grief and anxiety and her husband who is a psychologist attempts to help her cope with the death of their son. The two travel out of town to a secluded cabin in an area called Eden; a location the she had been to previously with her son as a getaway while she worked on her thesis about gynocide. Lovely stuff all around... 

 While in Eden the wife battles with her internal demons, and the husband starts to see strange things in the woods surrounding their cabin. First he sees a deer with a stillborn fetus hanging from its posterior. Next, he sees a fox disembowling itself, and the creature speaks and tells him "Chaos reigns". Eventually, he digs deeper into his wife's activities she had partaken in the last time she was in Eden. He finds that she had slowly slipped into madness, and eventually began to believe that women are born inherently evil. He is angered at his wife's new-found beliefs, but it's too late. The wife eventually snaps, and after forcing herself on him sexually, she knocks her husband into unconsciousness by way of an extremely harsh blow to his groin with a block of wood. And I don't mean a hard hit to his jewels, I mean it's bad enough that she starts to jack him off after he's passed out and he ejaculates blood. Graphic, I know. I told you this post was going to be shocking. 

She then drills a hole in his calf, and attaches a grinding stone to his leg so he can't get away when he regains consciousness. The husband does try to escape, and is able to drag himself into a foxhole in the forest. There he finds a crow that starts jumping around and squawking, giving away his location. The wife hunts him down, and eventually is able to get him back to the cabin. Eventually they get the stone off of his leg, and after a scuffle with his wife, he strangles her to death, burns her and the cabin down, and escapes into the woods. 

Now, I know I gave away some pretty hefty pieces of info for this movie, but there's still so much to is. I have only watched it once, but I really would be willing to bet money that this movie is one that can be watched multiple times and you'll find something new every time. The film is beautiful to watch- is it graphic and gruesome? Yes, 100%. But the director's use of lighting, setting, color, tone, frame rate and more makes for a visually beautiful piece of macabre art. Honestly, I would suggest watching it just for the haunting beauty in some of the scenes. In terms of film being a visual art, von Trier definitely does utilize it well. Since its release in the late 2000's, Antichrist has become notorious for... well, pretty much everything in it. And I totally get why- it's something that hurts to watch from beginning to end. But if you are up for the challenge, I do really recommend giving this one a shot. Speaking of shots, you may need some if you do decide to watch this- make sure you're prepared before hand! 

"Oh shit friends, it's Visitor Q." - May, Nyx Fears. 

This fucking movie.... 

I can say without a shadow of a doubt, this is one of the most disgusting, distrubing and insane movies I've ever seen in my life. Even out of all of the films I've discussed, and after viewing the other two on this list Visitor Q is the crown jewel of the depraved movies I've seen as of late. 

This movie, directed by Takashi Miike, was a direct to DVD release and has since become one of the most notoriously fucked up films ever to be created. And this isn't surprising if you're at all familiar with Miike's other films. I've only ever seen one of this other movies, and that is Audition, which I feel is probably one of the best Japanese horror movies I've seen. And that's from a perspective of having seen classics like Ju On and Ringu- both of which are prolific in terms of being well known on the horror circut. They even eventually were remade into major Hollywood blockbusters calle The Grudge and The Ring. I doubt we will ever see a reboot of Audition however, as it's thorougly creepy, distubring and horrific, and let's be real- lightning doesn't strike twice in the case of horror remakes. 

Having said that, Visitor Q, while it's credited as a "drama/ comedy"- I feel like both of those genres are used loosely. This film features incest, family abuse, drug abuse, prostitution, rape, murder, necrophilia and lactation sex. Yeah. All of that is in there. I have agonized pretty much all night and day for how to write about this movie, but honestly, I don't even know where to start. The movie is beyond fucked. 

The movie follows a family in Japan- the first scene focuses on the family's father having sex with his prostitute daughter. Later, he gets knocked out by a stranger who hits him in the head with a large rock for no apparent reason. Later the stranger joins the family in their home for dinner. The mother of the family gets beaten by her angry son who hits her brutally with a rug beater, leaving huge welts all over her body. The son also destroys the house by throwing objects through walls and windows. Then we learn that the mother is also addicted to heroin, and works as a BDSM prostitute on the side. Later, the father notices his son being bullied mercilessly, and this prompts him to record it on his digital camera as he's a news personality and he wants to make a story about it for syndecation. While all of this is going on, the stranger who hit the father with a rock is living with the family. This is Visitor Q. He doesn't say much, but him living with the family brings about positive changes. And what would those changes be, exactly? Well, let me tell you!!

First he introduces the mother to lactation sex. For those who don't know, that's the act of literally applying pressure to a woman's nipples by way of squeezing or suckling hard enough to produce milk, and the woman derives sexual gratification from it. After making a huge milky mess in the house, the mother starts to display more confidence at home and with her son; even going to far as throwing a knife at his head when he starts to try and abuse her. She misses, but the point has been made. 

He also helps the father! The father convinces his anchorwoman coworker to help him report on the bullying his son is experiencing. One day, the father, the coworker and Visitor Q are all in the father's car, watching and recording the son getting bullied again. The coworker eventually says it's stupid and doesn't want to do it, and the father gets angry, chases her down as she's leaving, rapes her and accidentally kills her. He then loads her body up in his car and takes her back to his house to cut her up and dispose of the body. While he's marking what areas to cut, he decides to have sex with her dead body.  While this is going on, the wife is showing off her new milking skills for Visitor Q inside, and literally turns the floor into a wading pool of breast milk and vaginal squirting on the floor. 

We cut back to the father who is still going to town and while he's having sex her body starts to move into rigor mortis and he gets his penis stuck inside of her. His wife has to help him get out by way of giving him heroin. Isn't this lovely? What a funny comedy, right? 

There's more that happens in this movie, but honestly do you REALLY want to know more?? Honestly I wasn't even sure I was going to talk about all of that because it's just too messed up. But this is why this movie is a hard-mode flick. It's hard to get through, hard to find, hard to stomach-- out of all of the movies I've watched this is the one that really took a lot out of me. I honestly can't say I would recommend this film for anyone for any reason outside of a dare. I would say in terms of Visitor Q I would put this on par with shock videos like 2 Girls One Cup, or Two Kids in a Sandbox but this one is decidedly longer. 

Well, there you have it folks. I've successfully and sufficient shattered my mind and seared my retinas with images that I won't soon be forgetting, and some I really would rather bleach from my memory all together. I'm looking at you, Visitor Q.  All in all, I've honestly kind of enjoyed this whole process- it's been nice to take my focus off of the horror that is COVID-19 and focus on imaginary horrors in its place. I hope that I've also inspired you guys into trying different films that you've either never heard of, or films that challenge you as a viewer. 

Brain Breakers #2- MIDDLEWEIGHT Category

Things are getting fun now, everyone...!

Alright, so in this newest installment of the Brain Breakers film-viewing series we're diving into the Middleweight category. The films featured here are of a higher quality than the films we explored in the Lightweight category; they have more cinematic and critical merit but also have clout in terms of their reputations. These films, while some are more known than others, are worth taking note of for various reasons, be it the plot, their contribution to cinema as an art form or their ability to challenge the viewer to think outside the box in terms of what is considered humorous, deep, or riviting. Also, they're pretty fun to show to friends to see their reactions- you know; for kicks. Now, on to the films!

First on this list is probably the more well-known film in this category and that is David Lynch's surreal horror classic Eraserhead. Now, in choosing the films in this category I was looking for films that could evoke a certain reaction from the viewer, and that would be one of shock, disgust, possibly fear and a feeling of "...wtf?"  And while Eraserhead fits ALL of those criteria I would say that this film is honestly so much more than all of that. For anyone who knows anything about film and film history, they can tell you that this flick has influenced cinema in some really impressive ways and honestly deserves a blog all on it's own just to cover everything. I didn't want to go in too deep on all of that in this blog, however, because it would literally dominate the entire post and leave little room to discuss the other two films. Just know going into this blog that Eraserhead has a lot of history and information attached to it. Moving on.

The story follows Henry (Jack Nance), a quiet man who one day unexpectedly finds himself thrown into marriage and fatherhood. That's pretty exciting, right? Wrong-o, my friends. The movie starts off with Henry going to visit his sweetheart Mary, who he hasn't seen in a while. After having an incredibly awkward and horrific dinner with his baby-mama's family (bleeding, moving, miniature

Henry spending time with his... baby.

poultry anyone?), and an even more uncomfortable interrogation from Mary's mother we learn that Henry and Mary had been intimate at some point in the past, thus blessing them with a baby. However, we also learn that the baby is "premature" according to Mary's mother, while Mary; who is clearly distressed- is quick to say that doctors aren't sure what's "wrong" with the baby. Mary's mother states that the two must be married immediately, and that night Mary and the baby spend the night at Henry's tiny apartment.

We learn quickly that there is  indeed something very wrong with the baby- it's deformed, resembling some form of an animal. It refuses to eat and it cries incessantly which leads Mary to have a mental breakdown and she leaves the baby in the care of its father.

Now, that's probably the clearest I can describe the plot, but that is leaving a LOT out. It doesn't cover much of what transpires in the film. But let's be real- this is a David Lynch movie; there's ALWAYS a lot going on. If you're not aware of who David Lynch is or his directing style he's notorious for using strange imagery and abstract visuals or intensely odd acting to lead his films forward all of which Eraserhead is LOADED with. I haven't discussed the Man in the Planet, The Girl Who Lives Behind The Radiator, the very strong male-potency imagery and the giant worms/sperm that make appearances through the rest of the movie. Seriously- this flick is wild and very unsettling in the things you will see. I really feel like I'm rushing this part of the blog, but really there's no way to describe much of what this movie covers without taking up a huge chunk of space- this is something that really should be witnessed so you can draw your own conclusions. This is a film that will really make you think while it's creeping you out completely- if that sounds like something you want to challenge yourself with, Honey, this is a flick for you.

Next on our list is an animated film known as Felidae which is based on a book of the same name. This film comes from Germany, and is to date one of the most expensive animated films to be made there. This film is probably the most deceptive movie in this category because the animation is really well done and resembles something that could have easily been put out by the likes of animation studios like Ambelin or Warner Brothers in terms of artistic style. An animated movie featuring talking animals; kitty cats in particular? How can that be deceptive? My response: heh, lol.

Felidae is a movie that is narrated by the main character, Francis, a cat who is moving into a new neighborhood with his owner. Upon arriving in his new home, Francis goes exploring around the house and finds his way outside. There he sees a rough-looking cat who is intently looking at something in the back yard. As he approaches the strange cat, Francis notices what the other is checking out- there is a third cat on the lawn; however this one is lying dead, its throat clearly slashed. We're only a few minutes into this movie and we've already got gruesome animated-cat murder on our hands! Buckle up, fam- this ride is about to get bumpy.  As more and more cats turn up brutally murdered in the neighborhood it's up to Francis to figure out what connects all of the murders in time to save lives before the murderer can strike again.

Francis discussing clues with a lead.

Felidae, despite being an animated movie about cats, is actually a really gritty, brutal and gruesome who-done-it style slasher mystery. While it is highly upsetting in terms of gore on the screen, the story remains intriguing and while there are some odd dream sequences that can be rather horrific and off-putting at times, this movie is a really good  murder mystery. Francis the cat, as you learn, is actually incredibly perceptive and has an eye for solving crimes. He's basically what the Great Mouse Detective wishes he could be.

This movie never got a release in the US- possibly due to it's graphic scenes of murder, harm to animated animals, sex, ritualistic cult suicide and animal vivisection. Yes- all of those things are in this film. However, the film, which was released in 1994, was distributed on VHS and Laserdisc; the latter of which featured an English dub, which was ripped and eventually found its way onto YouTube. As of right now this is the only place (at least that I'm aware of) that you can find the film in it's English-dubbed entirety. Obviously, this movie comes with a disclaimer- if you have a hard time watching those ASPCA commercials, this movie is definitely going to jack you up. Having said that, I myself am an animal lover, and while the scenes of horrible things happening to animated cats IS highly disturbing and hard to watch it really does add to the story; it makes solving the crime more urgent and imperative- something that off-screen death could never accomplish. And while it is really hard to see that stuff, it totally drags you into this twisted story and will leave a lasting impression on you for better or worse. Honestly, if you think you can stomach it, I highly recommend this film, especially if you like (literal) cat-and-mouse crime stories and race-against-the-clock mystery.

Okay guys- time to lighten this list up a tiny bit. The last movie in the Middleweight category is a movie that I only recently learned about (thanks again, May from Nyx Fears!) and I effing LOVE IT. It's a dark horror-comedy called The Greasy Strangler and it is, as of right now, one of the most quirky, awkward, gross and hilarious movies I've seen in a long time. The way I would describe this movie would be if Taika Waititi's Eagle vs. Shark had a love child with Napoleon Dynamite, and that child grew up on a steady diet of cheesy crime shows, porn and oil. Let's dig in, shall we?

Big Ronnie and Big Braydon leading
a disco tour. 

The Greasy Strangler follows father Big Ronnie and his son Big Braydon. Braydon and Ronnie live together and have a disco tour that Big Ronnie leads. One day after a tour, Braydon meets a woman by the name of Janet. The two quickly start a relationship that leads to Ronnie getting jealous of the pair. Ronnie, we learn, has a horrible secret- he's a serial killer who is called The Greasy Strangler. Before he commits a murder he covers himself with grease and then goes on the prowl for his victims.

As the story progresses, both father and son become fond of Janet, and they eventually compete with one another over her.

The plot on it's own sounds really odd, but I'll tell you, when you factor in the ridiculously strange soundtrack, the quirky humor, the ridiculous sex scenes and over the top full frontal nudity (I'm honestly not sure if the genitalia is fake or not...), you have all of the ingredients for an extremely weird dark comedy that will leave you asking "...seriously, what the hell did I just watch...?" I don't want to give away too much of the story, gags, kills or anything because they really are good for a laugh if dark comedy is your thing. Seriously- it's so awkward it's worth watching just to see how weird it gets. And it gets weird- it's beautifully weird and cringy and I love it.



Well friends, that concludes this portion of the Brain Breaker series. Next up is the really concerning titles. We're moving into the Heavyweight category and I'm going to be real- I'm a little nervous as to what I'm getting myself into on this one, fam. But I've come this far- there's no going back now.

As I mentioned in the previous entry, I did have to make some substitutions for films in this category. I couldn't find Pink Flamingos anywhere, so that will be substituted with a film called Into the Void. However, a A BIG thank you needs to go out to a friend of mine who found a copy of Visitor Q-  I almost had to substitute that one out, which made me sad because I hear this one is especially brutal but the day was saved. Thank you, movie friend! Your contribution is highly appreciated- you know who you are! The other film I'll be watching is Antichrist; from what I understand this one is gonna leave a mark.

Anyway, that's all for now. Thank you all so much for reading and I'll see you on the other side of this mental-torture. Pray for me.

Brain Breakers- #1- LIGHTWEIGHT movies

Oh boy, that was fun.

Well everyone, I've officially finished the first round of films in the Brain Breaker Series and I will say that these films are definitely a nice numbing agent to aid the mental beating I'm going to be taking thought all of this. Way to start things off on the right foot!

As mentioned in my previous post, I'm splitting all of the films I'm watching; 9 in all- into 3 categories in terms of viewing-harshness. They're broken down into Lightweight, Middleweight and Heavyweight, and as the title of this entry suggests, I just wrapped up the Lightweight category. The movies I lumped into this category are notorious for being low budget, weird, and hilarious in the fact that they are so bad. All of these films have been talked about at length from many other film critics, but they still are pretty interesting and really should be watched at some point- especially if you love so-bad-they're-good movies. Now, I will do my best to not give up any spoilers, but honestly, even if I were to divulge the entire plot of any of these films it wouldn't ruin any bit of the ridiculousness they feature.

Alright-let's get this show started!

 The first on the list was Manos: The Hands of Fate. This film has been hilariously riffed by the likes of MST3K and RiffTrax, and for VERY good reason. Of all of the films I watched in this group it is by far the worst. Having said that, it's still worth checking out.

The film follows a very white bread family who gets lost on a random road, and they find their way to a secluded mansion that is guarded by a pervy gimp named Torgo, who announces that he guards the establishment while "The Master" is away. Eventually you find out that "The Master" is a mustachioed cult leader who has far too many wives, and he wants to punish Torgo and the family for happening upon his pad by way of summoning the vengence of Manos, their weird god-deity-demon-thing.


This film is a train-wreck from start to finish. The dialog in the film is clearly dubbed (and not well), scenes are slow and drag on, you can see a clapper board at one point- it's a good study into what a film should NOT be. But at the same time, the fact that this movie is so off-the-wall bad has cemented it in cinematic history. The film has become a cult classic thanks to the laughable dialog, plot, and cinematic choices the director made.

The main family, consisting of the husband/father Michael, the wife/mother Margaret and the annoyingly useless plot-device daughter Debbie are the literal worst. Michael is basically a walking stereotype for alpha-male WASPs everywhere. This dude refuses to get directions, gets his family lost, and then essentially bullies Torgo into letting his family crash at a place that is in no way a motel, B&B or anything similar, and that's just in the first few scenes of the movie; he never gets any better through the rest of this mess. Margaret is also the worst because she lets her husband push her around through everything when she is clearly the closest thing this movie has in terms of a voice of reason. Debbie, as mentioned is just a plot device. She wanders off randomly which leads her family to have to try and find her, thus getting them further embroiled in all of the wacky cult shenanigans they are trying to stay out of. The whole plot around The Master is one of mystery to me- and by "mystery" I mean I either missed his back story while watching the film or they just decided he didn't need much in way of character development. He's the boogie-man of the film though they try REALLY hard to make the "god" Manos the big baddie but honestly, none of the villains in the movie are all that menacing. The closest thing to menacing in the movie is a portrait of The Master and his doberman that the film really likes to focus on. And I mean there is a good chunk of the movie where the camera rests on the picture while the characters are having a conversation in the background.

The Master's many wives are also ridiculous. You find out that they are suspended in some kind of living-death state between cult rituals, and when all of the wives wake up, literally the first thing they do is sit around a fire and bicker with each other about what to do with the family while The Master just sits off to the side looking like he is a whipped husband wishing he were anywhere else but there. Eventually the wives get into what appears to be a choreographed cat fight scene and it was honestly my favorite part of the movie.

And those things don't even touch on a majority of the nuttiness "Manos" has to offer. Seriously, it's a dumb flick from start to finish, but is worth watching if for no other reason than seeing a cult movie classic.

Next on the list is "Death Bed: The Bed That Eats". This film was made in 1977 and has a very interesting history. The film was written, produced and directed by a guy by the name of George Barry and was the only film he ever made. When the film was completed, Barry naturally wanted to release it theatrically, but was unable to find anyone willing to do that. Later on, there was a company interested in distributing the film on VHS; a tape was made, but the distributor wanted Barry to put ending credits on the film before it could be released. Ultimately, Barry had to decline because he couldn't afford the $3,000 it would have taken to add credits, so the tape was returned to him. However, somehow a pirated copy of the VHS was released in the United Kingdom and Barry had literally no clue that had happened. Over time, the VHS found its way to New Zealand, Spain, and Australia as well.

Barry remained in the dark about all of this until 2001 when he stumbled on a forum post about the film that had been written by a French film journalist. Eventually the film did receive a theatrical release in 2003, and was put on DVD the same year. And as of 2013 it was even released on Blu-ray.

The film follows multiple people over the span of a few different decades (maybe even centuries- I'm not sure) and their encounters with a demonic bed that, you guessed it, eats people. The movie has a narrator- the ghost of one of the bed's victims, who is now trapped behind a painting in the room in which the bed is kept. Why is he trapped there? Not even he knows. What's the ghost's name? Not a clue- he's only credited as "The Artist"- so we'll just call him Artie for the sake of the blog. Anyway, we learn through Artie's narration that the bed itself was created by a wind demon who wanted to seduce some random human girl for... reasons. So apparently in the middle of their romantic trist, the girl died so the demon cried tears of blood that were absorbed by the bed, thus bringing it to life, and ever since then the bed is insatiably hungry, so it eats whoever lies in it. That's it- that's basically the whole story. Granted, you don't find out any of the bed's back story until at least 30 minutes into the movie. And all of it is through Artie's delightfully British narration. All. Of. It. Even a majority of dialog from the characters that are in a scene are either composed of internal monolog or is spoken when you can't actually see the character's mouth; either their head will be turned so you can't see their mouth move, or they just dub it over the actor as their delivering their lines but sometimes it doesn't sync up properly.

This film was wild- wildly confusing but also wildly hilarious! The movie breaks down each portion of the film into meals- like the beginning of the film is called "Breakfast", then there's of course "Lunch" and "Dinner" and let me tell you- the further into the "feast" you get, the more insane the story becomes. By the time I got got "The Just Desserts" I was dying of laughter. This flick is definitely worth checking out. Out of all of the movies in this group, this was by far my favorite and the one I would suggest the most. I recommend all of them, but if you were to only watch one, hopefully this is it.

And finally I watched a modern so-bad-it's-good classic, Neil Breen's "Double Down".  Originally I had planned to do the seminal Breen classic "Fateful Findings", but his movies are notoriously hard to find and acquire- luckily I found "Double Down" in its place.

Now, for those of you who don't know who Neil Breen is he is an architect and prior real estate agent turned indie film maker who has been getting a lot of attention on the internet over the past few years due to his insanely weird and hard to follow movies.

Breen has been compared to the likes of other so-bad-they're-good film directors like Tommy Wisseau, the creator of the infamous film "The Room" (another movie you should definitely check out). Wisseau has been called the Orson Wells of bad movies; and if Wisseau is Orson Wells, Breen is definitely the David Lynch of bad movies- without a doubt in my mind. When interviewed about his films and a lot of the really weird, random, and confusing things featured in all of them, Breen loves to say that things in his films are "metaphors" that are up to the viewers to decide what they mean. And he literally says this about all of his films. And apparently all of his films (at least the ones that I've seen) are some really confusing and random metaphors! "Double Down" is no exception.

The movie stars Breen himself as... You know what, I don't even remember his character's name. Honestly, I think his character's name is only mentioned maybe a maximum number of 3 times in the film, and I feel like that's being generous. So yeah- it doesn't matter what his character's name is. All you need to know is he is a super amazing computer-hacking, government-overturning, philanthropic military-trained super mercenary who is literally the best at everything he does ever, yet he completely fails at everything in the movie. Seriously- all he does is have conversations with the apparent ghosts of his parents and fiance while running through the desert screaming about who knows what. He lives in his car out in the desert and he lives off of canned tuna. Seriously- that's all he eats and he has the empty cans to prove it. He uses old satellite dishes, old broken laptops and clamshell phones to create some kind of super weapon that kills people with some sort of invisible barrier, and he carries super deadly powder that he uses to kill fish in a lake and at one point he rubs this super deadly powder on a "target" and tells the viewers of the film that the powder "kills on contact" and his victim "will be dead in 5 minutes". Seriously- that's a line in the movie. And then the only real mission he gets in the film he epically fails at- words cannot fully describe what is witnessed in this dumpster fire.

There is so much going on in this movie, yet in looking back at it nothing actually happened. And even though nothing happened, I have SO many questions about the things featured in this movie. Honestly, even if I took the time to type out every question I have about this movie in this blog, I don't think I would ever run out of questions. The questions would breed more questions and eventually I would have a full blown W.T.F. hydra that there would be no way to slay.


In conclusion, these films were bad, but they were definitely the sweet numbing agent my mind will need as we move into the next category. The films featured in this post are harmless in terms of weirdness. All of these films are written, produced and directed by each of their respective creators, and they are clearly something that could be considered passion projects to those who made them. But even though the creators were definitely passionate about their feature films, clearly their intention didn't quite hit the level of fruition other movies have experienced. And really the cause behind that could is probably varied but ultimately, there's a lot of credit due to each of these directors because they had a dream and made it happen; and that's something that I think we can all appreciate.

Well fam, that's all for this round. I'll see you again soon with more brain-breaking films.